Sunday, August 19, 2012

#2 What's causing you to eat....???

While speaking with a dear friend, she read my blog and asked me these questions:
Chickie Sweet -- Here are some questions to consider!!!!
1.  Have you sat with a journal or tried to step back from yourself and observe what triggers a binge for you? 

2.  How is this binging serving you?

3.  I’ll ask the same question my choir director asked me, “Why won’t you let go?”

She said some other things that were very encouraging but she left me, she didn't know this about me and she was sad that I was going through this.  Well this isn't something that you talk about everyday.  It's practically something you keep to yourself.  Nevertheless, it made me think about her questions.

This was my response:

Let me begin by saying, the reason why I binge eat is because of lack of organization and the lust of the eye.  Unlike a lot of people, I don't have some deep need in my life. In all honesty, because I see something lying around I will have it. Hungry or not. Now that's not all the time -- there are days when I'm really disciplined and I just say no - but then there are days when I say, "What the heck -- all in moderation." and I will have it.

I find when I get organized, with the proper snacks, instead of standing in front of the pantry wondering what should I eat, and opting for the chips, I find I do a lot better.
I always work better by being organized. Writing stuff down, being accountable. Over the summer, after vacation, I got lazy and my made up mind went "kaplook -- or should I say, down the drain." My exercise has not been intensive enough to makeup for the added weight. So that has to improve as well. I always blame it on vacation. I do so well, then I go out of town and I eat differently -- I exercise too but I always come back heavier then I left. But the good thing was I started off really small. Had I started off at a big weight it would be really bad, in my mind, coming home EXTRA LARGE.

So there it is in black and white. I know what my problem is -- it's just a matter of doing something about it. I know what to do, because I've read all the books, been there done that with the weight loss, it's just a matter of doing it.

Jelly beans and candy are not my yo-yo food of choice.  I binge on corn tortilla chips and cheese popcorn. Tortilla chips are always in the house because my family loves them. Me and my husband can sit and down them with Ragu cheddar cheese. I can eat an entire bag if not careful. Popcorn is just another one of my favorite grab snacks. I can down a microwave bag all by myself. Sooooo there you have it. Self-contol and the lack of discipline.

Yes, thanks for your prayers. I will overcome this. I believe I can and I will. Just starting to write this all out is helping me already.
Until next time...

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